Stab Of A Knife
by elwoodluver00034
Summary: Um… so this is just a oneshot I wrote. When I first started writing it was Joey and Dawson. But as the story progressed it just became unanimous. It is still a DJ but trust me... it's not a happy DJ AT ALL. so plz r&r it would mean a lot.


Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, lines from the episodes, storylines or settings. I have no affiliation with the WB network. So don't sue me 'cause you won't get anything!

Summary: Um… so this is just a one-shot I wrote. When I first started writing it was Joey and Dawson. But as the story progressed it just became unanimous. But I still like it. It is a DJ… but not a happy DJ in the least. Trust me… I just wanted to post it somewhere because I think it's good and I want someone to read it. I hope you like it.

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My eyes are red. I've been crying. But you don't know that. You don't even notice my tear stained cheeks, my quivering lip… you don't even care… do you? I look over at you to try to gain some sort of attention. But you don't look. You're looking the other way. You look out at the water… free… gleaming everything that you can't have. Because you're with me. So why are you with me? If you want so badly to dive into its glory then why don't you? Why do you stay when you're obviously not content? I know why… because you're scared… you're scared that it won't work out… you're scared to lose your security… you're scared to lose me. But if you don't want me then why can't you lose me? You obviously don't care. Why? Why do you put me through this? Why do you break my heart one minute and hold me in your arms and tell me nothing else matters the next? Why do you make my stomach do summersaults? Why do make me love you so damn much? God… I hate you… but… I don't really know anymore. You're just… there I guess. You're my everything… why don't you understand that? Why don't you get into your head that nothing really matters without you? Why don't you just let me go and let me be free from your spell? Why can't you just let me go? For good? Just go off with that other woman… I know you want to. Why don't you just admit it to yourself. It's written all over your face. You can't even look at me strait without cracking. You see the sunset roll over the water… see it shimmer. You finally look over at me. My tears glisten in the sun as you smile. You smile… why do you smile? Am I really worth a smile? Am I worth you? Or is she what you want… what you really want? You know… I was pregnant once… yes… that's right. I was pregnant with your child… our child. But I didn't tell you. I couldn't tell you. I mean… how was I supposed to tell you? Because if I did I knew you wouldn't know how to react. I knew that you would throw a fit. That's why the day I miscarried I rejoiced. But I don't think I've ever cried so hard. But even if I did tell you you would have no sympathy. You would tell me it was my own fault… wouldn't you? God you heartless bastard. Why do you have to love me so much? Why can't you just leave me so I can hate you fully? Why don't you just desert me and make me want nothing more then forget? Forget the history we share… the love we share? Why? Do you enjoy torturing me? Do you enjoy watching me squirm… watching me fall apart day after day… become more broken? The wind picks up and you look back over the water. You watch the waves break on the horizon… you watch the sun dance in its rays… you watch as it creeps slowly into its depths. You are so enthralled by it. I can see it in your eye. That's the way you used to look at me. You thought I was a mystery… but when you finally solved me you just gave up on me. You hurt me so much. You fought your way into my heart and I can feel you struggle to get back out. Just leave… just walk out the door and never come back. Just stop breaking my heart every second of the day. Let me get over you… let me soak in my tears… let me know it's finally over. Just… give me some sort of clarity. I need it. I know that you may not… but I do… without it I'd always wait for you. I'd always sit out at the end of our dock and wait… wait for the day you come back to me… wait for the day I know it's really over… wait for the day that will never come. Because you're too afraid. And you always will be… won't you? I turn my head away from you and sob again as my whole world crumbles… crumbles around you…

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Reviews are very much appreciated! Thanks for reading my fic and I hope you enjoyed it! I would love some constructive criticism if you have any. THANK YOU! Now I think this is a good one parter… but if you want me to make it a story I will. Either way is fine with me. But if you do want me to continue you have to tell me in your reviews… and I WILL ud all of my fics asap. I'm sorry for not ud in a while. Everything has been really crazy and I just haven't had time. I also have about four new stories that will pop up in the near future… maybe three (one of them isn't that good). Anyway… I really hope you enjoyed and please review… it would mean the world to me. Thanks again.


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